With the sun’s rays shining in through the small window that was next to her bed, Somi slowly waked up and checked her phone. The time was 8:46AM and she realized that she hasn’t woken up past 7:30 in a while and that she was feeling quite refreshed. Then she thought in her head, what was the date today? She checked the small desk calendar - that currently wasn’t on her desk but on her bed - and read the date. May 5th. It was her birthday and she hasn’t even realized it. 

What was so great about birthdays anyway? Why did people take so much effort to celebrate themselves being one year older? It meant a lot when she was younger but now, it was merely depressing that she was growing older by the second and celebrating that fact didn’t seem exactly correct to her. She’d probably just get some birthday wishes here and there from friends of her’s and that’d be all, that’s how her birthday would end. 

She decided that even if she didn’t care, she’d do a special celebration for herself. By herself some nice things that she normally wouldn’t do and have some nice food. Her stomach was a little empty and to spoil herself, she decided to get some ice cream. Ice cream for breakfast, how new is that? She smiled to herself before getting herself casually dressed with a cap and a hoodie over her head to hide herself from all the bodyguards that were still probably going around looking for her. She did not want to be caught on such a day as today where she was probably going to have some nice quality time with herself.

Somi headed out and walked over to an ice cream parlor that she’s gone to when she was little. She walked in and awed over how nothing had changed. Everything was exactly the same. Even the workers did not change, she realized as she walked over to the counter. “One mint chocolate chip ice cream cone please!” She ordered with a wide grin. The man handed her the cone before his eyes went wide and he clapped in joy. “Eunkyung! My oh my, you’ve grown so much!” She cringed at the sound of her past name, the name she’s been wanting to run away from, but of course, he wouldn’t know that and she didn’t want to be explaining this to anybody. “Hey ahjussi, it’s nice to see you as well.” She offered a smile before taking a lick from the ice cream cone. The wonderful taste hadn’t changed either.

“How have you been doing sweetheart? Why don’t you come around anymore? Did you go off to college already? Your mom comes here often asking of you.” Was she hearing things correctly? Her mother was looking for her? She was the last person that Somi thought would care. She was always having affairs or getting drunk or on drugs to really care about her anymore she thought. “I’ve been busy with yeah, college work. I have a job too so I don’t have as much free time. I’ll promise to come and visit from time to time though!” She held out her pinky for the man to take and laughed when he wiggled his own before entangling their fingers together, pinky promising. She felt like a little kid again and that felt nice because little kids are all so innocent and they don’t know the dangers of the world.

She waved goodbye to the man after their promise and walked outside. The weather was so great today and she absolutely loved it. She looked around and saw children everywhere. She’s almost forgotten, today was May 5th, that meant it was Children’s Day. There were a bunch of people at the park that she walked over to and she laughed as a kid bumped into her while in a rush to get to a clown who was giving away balloon animals. She walked over to observe and was shocked when the clown handed her a dog shaped balloon and a smile. She laughed in return and walked over to look at all the other things that were set up at the park.

There was so many things for the children to enjoy. There was a Pororo man that she went up to and hugged and took a selca with. On the other side there was a magic show going on where a pigeon flew out of the magician’s hat and alongside with the children, Somi awed in amazement. She never understood people who could do magic. What was up their sly little sleeves? She enjoyed everything that was there that she completely lost track of the time. By the time she got home, it was already 6:49PM and she realized that she had a nice time. When she arrived in front of the doorstep she saw a letter that was gently placed there. She picked it up then headed inside.

She dressed back into some comfortable clothes before sitting down to do the rest of her homework that was due the next day for her Biology class. By the time she was finished with that it was already 9PM. She had an early history class so she decided that it’d be nice for herself to sleep earlier. She was about to head to bed when the letter caught her eyes again. It was probably something stupid but she opened it and skimmed through the letter. Her eyes widened as she read the bottom, Love, Mom.

Carefully, with the biggest hoodie she owned over her head, Somi walked past her old living premises. She looked past the gate and at the big house that stood exactly at the place it did years ago. Everything was the same, except for her. She admired how the lawn still looked so green and beautiful and how the windows were always so well polished. The people that worked for her parents were so loyal, unlike her. Her mouth tugged into a slight smile as she remembered the few good times she had with some of the workers. Despite not liking her nannies, the cooks, the gardeners, the maids were always so friendly and replaced the place in her heart that was empty because of her parents. They were the reason she felt at home, she felt alive. But now she couldn’t dream of going back, not back to that hell of a place. Somi liked where she was right now, she felt complete. 

It forever remained a mystery as to what her parents were doing right now. Were they caring about her? Did they even bother to look for her? Or was it someone else sending those annoying bodyguards around, following her every move? Could it possibly be that someone cared about her? Her sister couldn’t be that person, they never gave a crap about each other even when they lived together. She was glad she ran away or else she would have ended up like Eunseo, sold off to a man she’ll never grow to love. She remembered the day she got married, the look in her eyes, that was the first time she came crying to Somi, begging her to help her, but there was nothing she could do. They words she mouthed to her as she was walking down the aisle, the dislike was all over her face, but her parents refused to accept that their older daughter didn’t want to marry this man. She never liked the guy either. Just because he was a successor of a big company, didn’t mean he was a nice person. She still sees him around, at Haru, with other girls. These are the times she worries for her sister, wondering what she’s doing at home, who she’s allowed to have contact with. Does he abuse her? He seemed like a heavy alcoholic. How was Eunseo doing?

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car coming her way. She quickly ran once more and hid behind a bush. She peeked over and saw the driver opening the door and walked out her mom. She silently gasped at the sight of her, she looked so different. Not like the mom she knew that always strived to look young and not her age, she actually had wrinkles. This surprised her. It couldn’t be, was she actually worrying? Somi refused the tears that were about to come out of her eyes. No, she didn’t care about that woman anymore, she was a stranger. As soon as the car was gone from the scene and she heard the front door shut close, she stood up and ran once more, like that night she made her escape, hoping to get away from her past. She hoped to escape forever.

honeymadonna:

Most people search for perfection of life - having a luxurious life, being surrounded by the misleading wonders of money, having elegance and refinement that are forcefully crafted, being brought up by a seemingly perfect family, and living under the world of social glamour and beauty. While everybody is on a run for this “perfect life”, Somi, the very epitome of a girl having this “perfect life”, only desires of liberation from it.  At some point, despite losing her family, she felt lucky enough not to be pressed in such situation. She had a simple and happy life. Cheong Ju was a paradise to the young Heeyeon. Though almost the half of her life, she was unaware of an important piece of her, she could still say that she lived happily, from birth until the last breath of her parents. Imperfection is what makes us human. Imperfection is what makes life meaningful.

The outburst of Somi’s emotions broke her heart more than ever. The hardships she suffered all those years came out on her as tears. It was worse than being a mere lifeless doll, being steered by those strings held by her parents, letting her do everything the desired, without even consulting her about her life. It hurts to see her precious friend in such sorrow, but what hurts more is the fact that she can’t do anything but just give comfort. 

Heeyeon did what she always (and the least that she can) do. Running to her side, she enveloped the young girl in her arms. “Shhh. Don’t cry, Somi-ah” And yet she could feel her shaking and her tears damping her clothes. “Alright alright. Don’t worry. I promised you, didn’t I? I’ll stay by your side, whatever path you chose. If this makes you alive, then I will help you in any way that I could. You’re already my 동생 - together with Yoobin and Sunghee, you are a family I treasure ever since. Just follow your heart, Somi-ah. Everything will eventually fall in its right place at the right time.” Heeyeon hugged her tighter, pressing her face fully on her, hiding Somi’s crying face, as her eyes narrowed on a group of men in black suit seemingly peering at them from the outside.

Many probably would have died to live the life they saw Somi lived. Getting to shop without worrying about money, being able to take lessons in almost anything, going around the world on a private jet plane but really, a perfect life was hard to live. Everything that was shown on tv shows and movies were lies. All lies. No elite family, no perfect family lived like what was shown. And Somi kind of wished people would realize that. She hasn’t told her situation to many people outside the Madonna family but to the few she has they all would question her, why did you do it? Isn’t it paradise living a rich and elite life? Don’t you get to everything? Sure, you get to do everything, but it was whether you liked it or not. You didn’t have the freedom, and this was with almost every single elite family, not only her’s. She’s met other rich families, other daughters who had to go through the pain she had to, she still is in contact with some of them although none of them were brave enough to do what she did, run away. They always talk about it though, how much they want to escape the world that they are living in right now, of how jealous they are of Somi’s life at the moment, where she doesn’t have to go through any of the crap anymore. 

She didn’t want to cry, she really didn’t. Somi didn’t want to get her unnie worried again like she always did, but the tears came out anyway and she couldn’t stop them. She hung her head down low. “I don’t know what to do Heeyeon unnie.” She felt safer with the older girl’s embrace and she hugged her instantly. “I don’t know what I would do without you unnie. Or without Yoobin unnie or Sunghee, although that girl can be a little dumb sometimes.” She let out a small giggle at the thought of Sunghee’s failed attempts at correcting her unnies. She was glad that she had them around. Heeyeon unnie was right, they were family now. Madonna was now her family, and she wouldn’t have liked it any other way.

honeymadonna:

The misery in Somi’s eyes caught her. Yet again, her armor shreds piece by piece at the thought of her family, of the past life she had been running away. Heeyeon had been helping the girl ever since she found out her situation. The sudden change of disguises, the distractions she planned for the bodyguards and goons who were trying to catch her, she took part in everything. But later did she realize that they could not go on with this life forever. Sooner or later, Somi will be tired of running, and eventually, her exhausted heart would be left with no choice but to go back the life she dread living. In all honesty, she doesn’t even know what advice would she say to the young one. It would be a lie to say that she fully understand her situation. She has never been there. But all she knew is that it is just rightful to at least face her problem before complexity arises. “Try asking them again for another time. Let them know of your passion,let them know that you’re not happy with what they are forcing you into.” That wasn’t the wisest thing to say as of the moment, but it’s the least Heeyeon could say.

The words that came out of the older girl’s mouth was something that Somi wanted to do, but she was scared. She feared that as soon as she goes back that she’ll return to the life that she ran away from. The forcing of every single activity, different nannies every single week, not being able to see her parents’ faces, she didn’t want to go back to that, she was happier with her life now. But was she really? Was she really happy of running away all the time and having to try ridiculous disguises? She even dragged Heeyeon unnie into this and is making her suffer by trying to protect Somi. Maybe this wasn’t the life that she was meant to live. Maybe it’d be better if she just returned to what she was supposed to be living like. Cho Eunkyung, daughter of elite family that knows how to do everything, who is perfect. The burden grew in the girl again and she let out a huge breath, not knowing exactly what to do. “I-I’d like to unnie b-but I know my parents and they wouldn’t accept it, they just wouldn’t. I’d be pushed into ballet, piano, flute, violin, guitar, everything again and they wouldn’t listen to me. I think-I think I’ll just continue living my life like this. At least I get to do what I want to. I don’t have to worry about manners or ruining the family’s image. I have more freedom now.”

honeymadonna:

Their soft duet of laughter caught the attention of the baristas and waiters, peeking behind their work station to get a glimpse of the two young ladies. It’s been a while since they shared a time for stories and laughter, and it’s been a while since Heeyeon had laughed so genuine. At that moment, it was Heeyeon, and not Madonna’s leader. Unknown to everyone except the three, Heeyeon transforms into another identity once she takes the dance floor with them. Practices had always been fun for the three, but Heeyeon take it with much seriousness, to a point when she sometimes go hard on them, especially to the two maknaes, Somi, who takes a great amount of time to master the routine, and Sunghee, who diverts the group’s concentration from time to time with her silly antics. But at the end of the day, she would still be their Hee 언니, an older sister whom they could always depend on.

Soon their laughter fade out into thin air, and as Heeyeon glazed upon the girl’s brown eyes, she could see the pain and worry embedded in them. A fragile heart hidden behind her tough armor. She had always been that vulnerable - though it seemed to the world that she just casually run her past life away, Heeyeon knows she is greatly troubled by it. How far can she actually run? How long can she take this game of hide-and-seek with her family? She might have successfully changed her name, but her identity was still intact. Sooner or later, she have to face them, being caught or not. She had to confront her real life.

As if sensing the change in the path of their discussion, Somi’s lips straightened, as she took another sip of her coffee. Heeyeon took hers, and observed how the cream yet again resembled to form an upper layer in her coffee despite mixing it few minutes earlier. She didn’t take a sip, but instead, she looked at her younger friend,  and with an eyes of honest concern, Heeyeon let out a question she had been reluctantly keeping in her mind. “How long are you going to run away from them, Somi-ah?”

She was always really glad that she had a shoulder she could lean on because currently she had nobody by her side. She was always thankful for Heeyeon unnie and the rest of the Madonna members. They were the only ones that knew her background and where she came from but they loved her before she told them the story and they stuck by her after she spilled the beans. Heeyeon unnie, Yoobin unnie, and Sunghee were her family now. She didn’t know of the elite Cho family that she came from, she’s forgotten about them.. At least in her head she did. Sometimes, very sometimes, she still thought of them and felt them in her heart and how she played with her parents when she was a baby But then the bad memories came back with all that. When she was put in the hands of a new nanny almost every week after she was four. It was tiring, she didn’t have anyone to trust, it was difficult for her at such a young age.

Somi froze for a second at the older girl’s question. She let out a huge breath and closed her eyes for a while. How long is she going to run away from the truth? From the people who are looking for her? For how long could she keep this up? Even if she went through all these disguises, it won’t work and it’ll make it harder for her to live the life that she wanted. She just wanted to be college student Bae Somi that was an orphan and worked at Haru with dance club Madonna. But she couldn’t do that.. Not here at least. “I-I’m not sure unnie. Honestly, I’m sick of all the running, not being able to roam the streets freely without having to worry. Running away in the high heels, it’s sick, it’s tiring, and it’s just not what I wanted.” She swung her head down and looked at the ground. She didn’t know what to do.

honeymadonna:

A genuine smile crept on her face as Heeyeon watched the lady sit in front of her. If her memory serves her right, it was months since they had the time to actually have some serious talk, one that doesn’t have anything to do with Madonna, or Haru, or anything else - just plain Bae Somi and Ahn Heeyeon. 

“I’m quite good. And you Somi-ah?” The older replied. She was thankful that at least, despite her hectic schedules in the university and practices for Haru, she was still able to find time for such meeting. The lack of time almost made them distant from each other, and both know they needed this time to catch up, and in a way, relax and break free from the complications of their lives. And in honesty, this is one of Heeyeon’s attempt to lead a life like she did before he came. 

And speaking of lives before, Heeyeon was very knowledgeable of one parcel of Somi’s life that she’s been running away from. Cho Eunkyung. A person she met only for a day, and a person Somi has been trying hard to brush away. Heeyeon had admired the girl from the moment she saw her. She looked fragile to say the least, but a strong willed person if you will look closely. How she managed to turn away from a life of greatness and perfection, and chose to live a simple, mediocre kind of living - there were few people who could actually do such, and yet a young girl like her was able to do so. 

“So, how long did they take to catch you this time?” Heeyeon said jokingly, pertaining to the bodyguards who were constantly on a run for her. It has been a source of laughter for the both of them, but she knew Bomi wouldn’t mind. And besides, it was her who helps the girl to get rid of the bodyguards once they caught sight of Bomi, whether through distracting them or placing Somi under a disguise. It even came to a point when they ridiculously dyed her hair blue and have her wear full bangs. Heeyeon laughed at the thought. “I told you to just stick with your blue hair. It can go for years and they wouldn’t notice!” Heeyeon said, earning a frown from Somi, which in turn brought laughter to her face. 

She sat down and slumped back on her chair a little, she didn’t care if people looked at her in a weird way, she was in front of her unnie who would understand. It has been a while since Somi has sat down and talked to anybody seriously, not having to worry about what they thought of her. She took another sip of her dress and released a big breath. “Horrible. I have like three reports due on Friday and I haven’t even started on two of them.” She raised up her glass of coffee, “This thing will be my best friend for several days.” She laughed and thought back on the reports. It was times like this where she kind of regretted running away because she wouldn’t have to be worrying about this stuff if she stuck with her parents. Of course, she’d be learning about business instead and thinking of that kind of made her relieved that she ran away. Mixed feelings always ran through her.

She pondered for a moment at Heeyeon’s question. “It took them like three days after I dyed my hair back to the brown.” She took a strand of her hair and showed it to her. She laughed when she brought up the horrible blue hair she once did to get herself away from the annoying bodyguards who wouldn’t leave her alone. Didn’t they have anything better to do? Like catch the millions of people who were threatening to kill her father. “The blue was horrendous unnie. I am never going back to that again. It was partially my mistake for not wearing a hat, forgot one at home.” She frowned at the thought where she was heading to dance practice with the rest of the members and the bodyguards caught a glimpse of her then started chasing after her. Good thing Somi was a pretty darn good runner. 

honeymadonna:

Light, small bubbles softly crackled as they landed on her small lips. She let it stay for a while, enjoying the dainty pleasure it gave her. It was one of those few moments when she appreciate minute detail as such. She could have enjoyed it more like before, but then the circumstances wouldn’t even give her a chance, until now. Another sip of the steaming coffee, and she let the brown liquid wash her cream-tainted lips. Coffee almost gave her the same tranquility as the alcohol does on her. And she hates how both temporary their effects are on her.

Sitting beside the glass window pane with the scenery of a busy Hongdae under a crisp, light morning, Heeyeon let herself be drawn to observing the people that passes by. Not that she was really this observant to such petty things, she just wanted to distract herself a bit while waiting for someone. She needed to kill time, or else her mind would drift away and would lead her again to think of something, or someone rather, that she should not be thinking. So it was better to just enjoy the fast scenes coming before her eyes as she quietly stares from behind the glass window of the cafe. It wasn’t much of an entertainment at first, but as seconds and minutes passed by, she found herself quite engaged in this kind observation - and a curiosity started to spark inside of her. Looking at those men in their office suits, all tidy and very respectable-looking, those women sleekly walking with their formal skirts and coats paired with high pumps or stilettos, the high school female students giggling as they walk leisurely, and those male students from behind them, quietly whispering to each other, probably how one adored a girl from the group of students in front of them, she wondered what kind of life these people are leading to everyday. What their pasts are? What the other side of their coin looked like? What is the story behind their smiles? or their straight faces? She was just sure that they have their other side which is clearly covered by their everyday look, like her, like every person she knew.

Her train of thoughts, as well as the scenery flashing in front of her eyes, stopped as a lady, in plain simple jeans and a white blouse, appeared in front of her on the other side of the glass. She waved vigorously, and Heeyeon replied with a soft smile as she nodded, inviting her to go inside. Bae Somi. It was her who invited Heeyeon for a morning date, which they haven’t done in a while now. And she was grateful for it.She knew they both needed this kind of talks once in a while.

Somi woke up and realized that she’s slightly over slept to meet her Heeyeon unnie down at the small cafe across the street. She stood up and got dressed in a plain white blouse and jeans and grabbed her bag before heading out the door. After the morning meeting, she had to go to class so she wanted to be prepared if their talk was going to go overtime. She walked outside her dorm and breathed in the fresh air. It was such a nice day with a slight breeze and the sun peeking out from behind the clouds. Just the weather that she preferred. Not exactly rushing because the cafe was just around the corner and she wasn’t that late, she looked around the campus and saw some people already running to classes and campus couples who were having breakfast together by the lake that the school held. It was beautiful seeing two happy people together, Somi just wished she could be one of them. 

Finally making it to the cafe, she peeked in to find her unnie already sitting down waiting for her while stirring her coffee. She walked up to the table she was sitting down at and took the seat across from her. “How are ya unnie?” She put her bag on the side and called a waiter over before ordering a drink. Coffee was something that Somi didn’t think she’d ever drink but after running away from home, it was everyday life. It spurt up her energy enough for her to concentrate during classes and her electives. Of course, it didn’t last too long so once she arrived back in her dorm room, she was on her bed already, falling asleep. That was one thing she disliked about coffee, it’s short effects.

honeymadonna:

Hmm. Maybe all of us could go and crossdress for a night. What do you think? haha. That’ll make you even more suspicious. Yeah you could fight with them but it won’t stop their search for you. Ugh. Why are they so persistent? ><

That’s be do much fun! We can like change our group name for the day and be like the Jacksons or something :D Yeah it’d make them think I’m trying too hard. Why do they even want me back? They have Sojin they can torture.

(Source: angelic-rebel)

honeymadonna:

Madonna couldn’t have a boy as a member. XD But yeah you’ll be a pretty flower boy. If we couldn’t do something about your disguise, then I’ll try to do something to get them away from you

Aww, why not? We’d be one crazy group 8D Like what? Make me carry around a bodyguard myself? :\ I could always fight them myself but that’s too much work. Maybe the tae kwon do lessons I had a long time ago will come in handy

(Source: angelic-rebel)